


baby, it's cold outside

by ladanse



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Blow Jobs, Episode: s03e23 All Our Yesterdays, Fluff and Smut, Intercrural Sex, M/M, PWP, Pre-OT3, Smut, caveman!Spock, what if they acted on it, you know the enormous sexual tension in THAT scene?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-13
Updated: 2018-07-13
Packaged: 2019-06-09 20:16:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15275370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladanse/pseuds/ladanse
Summary: Bones and Spock are stuck five thousand years in the past, with Spock reverting rapidly to the barbarous nature of his Vulcan ancestors. What's a man to do?In Bones' case, get laid.Remix of All Our Yesterdays (season 3, ep 23) bc there are three stages of watching this ep:1. I thought this was Star Trek, not a bad daytime soap2: I thought this was Star Trek, not the intro to bad porn3. but WHAT IF IT WAS





	baby, it's cold outside

**Author's Note:**

> the first thing I've finished in MONTHS including original writing and it has to be. this. i hate the st writers SO MUCH for making me think about this like. did you know bones has a thing for being choked? in canon? well now you do. you're welcome for not putting it in here.
> 
> title is obvs from the song, because i couldn't resist and i have nothing to lose

Leonard McCoy was many things, but he was not stupid. Next to Spock and Jim - the two shining stars of the Federation and its publicity vids - he tended to seem dull and red-faced and a bit blustery, but he knew better than anyone that it was only so because it suited him.

  
Better, at least, than Spock, who evidently had not realized he was being riled. Bones had always known how exactly to play Spock's irritation like Spock played his lute, and to his own ends: Spock would always give Jim whatever he asked, easy, but with Bones he required a bit of teasing, closed-lipped until his irritation tumbled out with whatever Bones wanted of him.

  
Right now, in this godforsaken cave on a godforsaken planet in the middle of its worst Ice Age, five thousand years in the past, what Bones wanted was an explanation, one he clearly wouldn't get without a fight.

  
Fine. He knew how to take a punch.

  
_It's not like you to give up trying to find the Captain_ , he said, and Spock replied with something that, if he were Jim would mean, _Captain, I am happy to grow old here, with you_.

  
With Bones, it didn't - couldn't possibly - mean that. The only alternative was that Spock had found in Zarabeth a stopper for the Jim-shaped hole in his Vulcan heart, and so had resigned himself, logically, to his fate.

  
Spock threw the accusation back in his face with a subtle emphasis on how _attractive_ Bones found the prospect of staying, one that Bones had thought beyond his straightforward Vulcan speech.

  
Well, Bones thought, and resigned himself to insults. Spock was being a right pain in the ass, and so deserved it. How was that, for logic?

  
"Now," he began, "you listen to me, you pointed-eared Vulcan - "

  
Spock - Spock who hadn't even been _looking_ at him - turned, abruptly; fisted a hand in his blue tunic, and yanked him upward, face to face, inches apart, and Bones _stopped_.

  
"I don't like that," Spock enunciated crisply, losing the ends of his words to his anger. His hand was trembling; his lips curled slightly over his teeth, ferally. "I don't think I ever did, and now I'm sure."

  
Bones thought two things: one, this isn't Spock, and two, oh _fuck_.

  
"Spock, what's happening to you?" he said, to address the first. His eyes addressed the second, and flicked themselves down to Spock's lips.

  
They were so _close_ , and -

  
Spock was speaking again. Bones could feel every breath across his lips, the corner of his mouth. "Nothing that shouldn't have happened long ago," Spock said. Time skipped for a moment - Spock swayed abruptly closer - and then gathered his hand in Bones' shirt and shoved him away, back onto the cot.

  
Bones watched him, frozen and looming over the bed, and raised an eyebrow, subtly, in challenge.

  
Spock's chest was heaving; Bones couldn't look away from his dark eyes. He was hard in his regulation pants, and there was no way Spock hadn't noticed.

  
Long ago - there was something about that, wasn't there? Long ago, the Vulcans had been barbarians, passionate and uninhibited and _wild_.

  
Was Spock regressing, having been thrown so abruptly into the past? Losing his carefully ordered mind to raw, atavistic desire? Bones' cock pulsed in his pants, at the thought, and Spock's breathing hitched visibly.

  
"Well? Do it, if you're going to," said Bones. Perhaps he _was_ stupid, after all. "Or don't, and go out to look for Jim instead."

  
It was the mention of Jim that did it, as Bones had known it would. Faster than he could think, Spock was atop him, gripping his shoulders hard enough to bruise and pinning him to the bed, and oh, _yes_ , did he like that. Bones arched, fighting lazily, and Spock's eyes went dark and hazy above his.

  
"You cannot escape me," Spock said, as if testing the thought, and shifted one hand to the center of his chest. Bones struggled, completely immobile under the pressure of one long-fingered palm. He couldn't breathe - couldn't _think_ \- and there was Spock's hand, moving deftly over the shape of his cock, stroking proprietarily.

  
"Spock," he gasped, and Spock's mouth tilted into a familiar smirk. "Doctor," he said, smooth and low but still breathless, and Bones' stomach turned liquid.

  
Goddamn, was he going to regret this, but if it wasn't going to be the best sex he'd ever had, unless - well.

  
His hands were still free. Bones reached upwards, tangled them into Spock's orderly bowl cut, and pulled Spock's face down to his, biting at his mouth, angry and desperately turned on. Spock gave as good as he got, nearly drawing blood, and slid a knee between Bones' thighs and a hand over his hip.

  
His thumb dug into the muscle above Bones' groin, hard enough to bruise. Bones groaned, gravelly, and attempted to arch into the pressure before finding he couldn't move, at all; he truly was at Spock's mercy.

  
"Touch me, dammit," he said, irritated; the fabric above his cock was nearly soaked through and he needed Spock's hand -

  
\- or his mouth. Bones struggled upward, the pressure on his chest abruptly released, his mind wiped clean as Spock mouthed teasingly over his happy trail.

  
"Spock," he said, fully aware of the state of his voice.

  
"Undo your pants, Doctor," said Spock, nearly growling, meeting his eyes, and Bones - well, he couldn't say no to something like that. He scrabbled to pop his button, pull himself out. Spock watched him, eyes hungry, frozen.

  
_Well_ , then. Grinning, he wrapped his hand around the base of his cock, drew it upwards and twisted, sighing luxuriously at the friction. "Come on, Spock," he said, "I'm sure you know what to do."

  
A flicker of the old Spock in the way his eyebrow flicked upwards, automatically - but then his mouth was closing, blood-hot and hot, over the head of his cock, and Bones stopped thinking. He moaned, showily, and watched Spock shiver.

  
"Just like that," he said, approving, and let his hips jerk upward, into Spock's mouth.

  
Spock pulled off, met his eyes, and placed both hands deliberately on his hips. Slowly, he pressed downwards, pinning Bones again; his cock twitched visibly between them.

  
Spock raised an eyebrow, intentional this time, which was as precisely irritating as he meant it to be.

  
"Get on with it," said Bones, and then Spock met his eyes, amused and darkly satisfied, and hell, when did he become so easy to read?

  
Somewhere about the time he flung his inhibitions to hell just to suck your dick, Bones thought to himself, sensibly.

  
Spock took him into his mouth again, and Bones whined before he could stop himself. This time, Spock didn't tease, sucking sloppily and edging one of his hands inward to press bruises into his thighs, fondle his balls. When Spock pressed lower, rubbing against his hole, Bones twitched, violently.

  
"Don't get any ideas," he said, because they were still in a cave, and his medical pack - with its small bottle of lubricant - was sitting pretty back on the Enterprise.

  
Spock met his eyes, with Bones' dick still in his mouth, and Bones shivered, riding out a wave of electric heat. Spock let him sit on the knife's edge for just a moment, before hollowing out his cheeks and sucking, hard.

  
Bones was _gone_. He let himself come, tilting his head back and giving into the pleasure of Spock swallowing around him.

  
His first coherent thought, after that, was _I thought Vulcans were vegetarians_. Wisely, he didn't voice it. Spock had pulled off him, and was stroking his stomach, gently - almost tenderly. Bones, abruptly, realized he could imagine Spock doing this for Jim - and wasn't _that_ a thought?

  
Not one he could permit himself. And there was still Spock to see to.

  
"Come here, you stubborn thing," he said. His voice always slipped southerly when he was tired, and especially after sex, but Spock didn't seem to mind; he was still tucked firmly into his pants, but Bones could see where he was straining against them, hot and hard.

  
Bones unbuttoned him, stroking gently, and Spock's knees gave out. Damn, but he was responsive.

  
"Doctor - " said Spock, strained, and then changed his mind. "Leonard. Please."

  
"I've got you," he said, and guided Spock into the hot space between his thighs. "Come on."

  
Spock thrust once, experimentally, and his head dipped, mouth trailing along Bones' chest. He thrust again, harder, and shivered. Bones shivered with him - his thighs were sensitive, though he wouldn't be getting hard again - and Spock's eyes opened, meeting Bones' gaze squarely.

  
"If we ever - " Spock panted, thrusting again - "if we ever return to the Enterprise, Doctor, I should like to do this inside of you."

  
"You'll have me," said Bones, and meant it. Spock shuddered, overcome, and managed a few more thrusts before coming, tense and shocked, into the hollow between Bones' thighs.

  
Bones reached a hand up, stroked across his back, through his hair. Spock lifted his head - the corners of his mouth were turned up, was that a _smile_? - and kissed Bones, lazy and tender. For a moment - a blind, blissful moment - Bones let himself forget that they were stuck in the past, and that if they ever returned it wouldn't matter anyway.

  
Then, Spock straightened up, quietly redoing Bones' pants, and it was over.

  
"You know she'll say anything to keep us here," Bones said, cautiously.

  
"I know. I have not been - myself." Spock buttoned himself up. "But is that so terrible a thing?"

  
Bones sighed, and gave the right answer. "It is, Spock. You don't think I - well," he revised. "The Enterprise needs you as you are. And so does Jim."

  
Spock turned his head, at the mention of Jim, and studied Bones' face. His mouth twisted, and Bones couldn't help the sensation that he'd been found wanting.

  
"I suppose he does," said Spock, far away. He stood, and then held out a hand. "Come, Doctor. I will need your help searching for the portal."

  
"Damn right, you will," said Bones, and let Spock help him to his feet. Spock made to pull away - but Bones stopped him, and let himself be selfish, just once. Spock's fingers were cool, where Bones slid his own across them: a Vulcan kiss.

  
Spock looked surprised, and tensed with some unnameble emotion. Bones ignored all that, because it was over, now. "Well? Come on, then," he said, and they stepped out of the cave.

  
*

  
They found it, of course, and made their way back through, beamed up immediately, watched the star explode in the rearview mirror, et cetera.

  
Bones leaned against the bridge's railing, not looking at Spock. Spock hadn't moved from the science station, recording the nova. But Jim - Bones met his gaze, and realized he was being studied.

  
Jim was inscrutable at the best of times; right now his face was positively alien.

  
"Spock," he said, tone casual. Several alarm klaxons went off in Bones' head, in rapid succession. "I'm glad the two of you didn't freeze out there."

  
"Indeed, Captain," said Spock, distracted. "The temperature was quite low; the doctor nearly succumbed to hypothermia at first."

  
"But he didn't?" Jim asked.

  
"Evidently, he did not," said Spock. He had turned, and was watching Jim, now; they both were.

  
"Silly question, of course," said Jim. "He had you to keep him warm, didn't you, Bones?"

  
Bones clamped his jaw shut. He could feel the muscle ticking away. Spock's face had gone totally blank.

  
Jim gave the little half-smile which meant, _ahh, irony_. "Report to my quarters, both of you, nineteen-hundred hours, for debrief. Understood?"

  
"Captain?" said Spock. It was barely a question.

  
"Is there a problem, Mister Spock?" said Jim.

  
The only answer Spock could give was, "No, Captain."

  
"Well, then, you heard my orders," Jim replied, brisk. "Mister Sulu, take us out, warp two."

**Author's Note:**

> jim will never stop giving them shit about this, ever.
> 
> fun fact this doc is saved on my laptop as 'yabba dabba doo'
> 
> kudos pls if u liked feel free to send crack headcanons & comments into my inbox <3 <3


End file.
